Carol Anne and I found each other doing theatre. I’ve written many odes to our relationship throughout the years, but it was when she had the opportunity to play the role of Mary Poppins in 2015 that I became aware of the perfect quote from that script to describe the Carol Anne I know.
My world was calm, well ordered, exemplary; Then came this person, with chaos in her wake.Mary Poppins
I can say, with no uncertainty, that life would be a clean, well-organized, routine bore; free of change, risk and imagination without Carol Anne. It would be too easy or cliche to say “she completes me.” We spar. She challenges me. She doesn’t make me better. She inspires me to want to be better.
I’ve never met someone with more faith in faith. Even in her most frustrating, doubtful moments in people, unforeseen circumstances or situations simply out of our control, she finds a way to keep moving forward with a strange blend of childlike optimism and wisdom beyond her years. She sets high standards for others to think bigger in simpler ways while prescribing a healthy dose of expectations.
She isn’t my “other half.” She’s my partner. We put our relationship first to allow us to put our children first. She’s seeded an independence in our kids that I know will be an advantage to them in their darkest hours. She wears herself out for our family as she does, for anyone, at any given moment, if that’s what her heart is telling her to do.
I am never unaware of the endless possibilities of what she’s given up for me and her boys. Nobody deserves Carol Anne. I wouldn’t wish her crankiest moments on ISIS anymore than I would wish her most selfless moments on me. She makes me feel alive in a world that I’ve easily let myself not want to be. It’s that spectrum of unpredictable predictability that keeps me on my toes and discovering new ways to love her. And she’s hot.
Photo Courtesy of Darbey Delaney Photography